March Goals:

I realize this post is coming a couple of days into March, but not because I haven’t been pursuing these goals already.  Simply because I haven’t had a chance to write them down.  Believe me, I have been thinking about them.

1. Goal number one: Be less critical of others.  This is a really bad habit that I am sad to say I have picked up.  I think a large part of it honestly has to do with how hard and critical I can be with myself.  I have always expected a lot from myself, and others.  That isn’t what is wrong with this, what is wrong with this is being super imposingly critical of others.  This can range from things like not being understanding of other’s mistakes, to simply being critical of someone’s looks.  This has affected me since I’ve lost weight.  I am quick to notice and criticize other’s who are over weight, due in a large part because I fear being over weight and because I am actively working on my body.  I am ashamed of this, obviously.  Thus the reason my goal is to be less critical of others.  I have set it as my intention in each of my yoga sessions and been biting my tongue.  I am hoping to have mastered this by the end of the month.
2. Reach my GW1.  I am only 4 pounds away from GW1.  I have been hovering around/maintaining this weight for around a month now.  I hit a plateau, then I got over the hump but have been a little more lax with calorie counting and eating.  This isn’t a bad thing entirely, because I am comfortable with my weight and where I am now.  I have been building muscle so I am still losing inches and toning up a lot.  BUT, I have my goal in mind, I am 9 pounds from my ultimate goal and only for from my first goal weight.  With that said, I am hoping and working towards my GW1 for the month of March. This means that I am buckling down, no longer eating out and really making sure to do a wide range of workouts.  This also means being a lot more mindful of my calories.  The positive of this experience is that I now know how to comfortably maintain.  Let’s be honest, that’s going to be a really important skill once I get to my goal. Which, I know I will do.  Hopefully by the time Coachella gets here!

So, my goals are short but involved and I really hope to do great.  When March ends, we will see. 

weight loss update.

This weekend was another crazy food filled weekend. We were in Salt Lake City where a lot of my favorite locally owned restaurants are. I couldn’t and didn’t miss a chance to eat freely but within reason. I had a couple of my favorite beers and whiskeys, as well. I think I am now realizing that the best part about losing weight slowly is that if I do choose to have an off weekend, my body is great at regulating and metabolizing it. I usually bloat for a couple days and then it comes back off. It really has reiterated to me that I’m happy I did things slow and steady. Workouts this week have been awesome. Lots of zumba and tons of cardio. I’ve been pushing myself really hard and it feels great. I’ve eased up a bit on restricting calories since I have been working out for about an hour and 45 minutes everyday. I want to listen to my hunger cues and start to acclaimate to not counting calories and just knowing what and how much to eat. I also had Josh hide the scale when we got home. I decided to go through the week and feel things out for myself as opposed to focusing on the scale. Salt Lake was incredible. I have literally never in my life recieved so many compliments on how great I look. It really was so nice, I was extremely thankful that everyone noticed. These days, everyone has noticed my weight loss from people from my last semester classes to zumba friends to my instructors to friends and family. It’s really nice to have my hard work recognized. Anyways. I am feeling happy and healthy. What more could you ask for? I’m officially 30 pounds down. Maybe more, i’ll find out Friday.

Progress Blog:

Has been updated.

So far,

Since last Sunday I am down 2.4 pounds. That’s not including my workout tomorrow and Sunday. I am really happy I decided to get a gym membership. I’m excited to see if I lose anymore this week after running ten miles on a high resistance.

fierce-not-fragile:

This, this, THIS! Your experiences should not be determined by your weight. I know it’s hard when it truly has bearing upon your self worth, but just think of it this way: You’re working towards where you want to be, you’re making progress, you WILL get there, but in the meantime you’ve got to love yourself and continue to do the things that make you happy because otherwise the sweetness of your victory, reaching the end of your journey, will be tainted by how much you’ve missed out on along the way. 

I need to remember this.

(Source: dailyfatspiration)

Yesterday was less than ideal,

So today I am trying combat it by eating two of my meals in smoothie form which means fruit and veggie Smoothies. I’m trying to eat clean and keep my body happy. I want to get back on track to my goal and be very closed by my birthday. An hour of zumba tonight and maybe 20 or so minutes of boxing after work.

Today:

is one of those days where being a comfortable size 8 isn’t enough.  It isn’t enough that I dropped down from a 12.  All I can think about is how far I have to go, not how far I’ve come.  All I can think about is how much more appealing a size 4 or 6 sounds. 

Gah. :(

Today is my boyfriend’s birthday:

Which means an off day for my calorie counting.  Why? Because my boyfriend likes food (Mexican, pizza, etc) and I know he want me to enjoy these things with him.  I don’t want to bring stress to his birthday by being nit picky and stressing on my weight and body.  I’m going to stay positive and happy and just realize that tomorrow is a new day, where I can run and kick some butt and thankfully breathe deep knowing that I have successfully made it through Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, My anniversary, New Years Eve, a weekend out of town and my boyfriend’s birthday.  These last couple months have been tough and while my weight loss has slowed and staggered a little bit, I haven’t gained; I have continued to lose.  I’ve noticed that since I am now comfortable in my own skin and fully aware that I am going to make it to my UGW within the next 2 months, I have kind of calmed down and given myself a break and stayed positive about my goals.  Slow and steady wins the race, I suppose.  Don’t get me wrong, I definitely count calories on most days and I ALWAYS work my butt off with cardio, classes, boxing, toning, etc. but I guess I’ve just kind of eased up and realized I am comfortable with where I am and that my goal is attainable and close (I’m 21.2 pounds down, with 6.8 to my first goal and 11.8 to my UGW) so knowing that I have made it more than half way has been a big solace for me.  Knowing that I’ve lost 4 pants sizes has been huge, too.  My belly is very near flat and as of now, I am really just working on losing the rest of the weight so I can start toning.  My birthday is the 27th and I am hoping to be within two pounds of my first goal or to my first goal by then.  Which means a lot of healthy and clean eating from here on out. 

Anywho. Short update on my weight loss ish.  Now, I am going to take a nap because today is my day off.

I’m out.

So I am beginning to wonder:

If my scale is broken. I weighed in yesterday morning then subsequently weighed myself again ten minutes later without eating or drinking anything and it was a two pound difference. This morning I weighed myself and it was different from both numbers yesterday. What the fuck.

So,

As far as weight loss goes for the past week of being on vacation and Christmas family stuff, I gained 2.5 pounds last week and then lost 1.5 pounds of it this week and kind of took it easy. My mom made my great grandmothers pasta sauce recipe and I ate it with happiness. Its my favorite food and the world and literally the first solid food I ever ate. I kept up with my working out by taking easy runs today and yesterday. I’m not getting crazy with my running since I just started again since my injury. I consciously decided to take it easy but stay consistent these last couple weeks. I have 8 pounds till my goal weight and 13 until my ultimate goal when I start to tone up. My birthday is January 27th & I am going to kick things into super high gear for all of January so that I am at goal weight by then. I am still feeling really good about everything and how far I’ve come and how I know I am going to achieve my goal soon.